Cultural Dirty Words
When I was growing up, there were a number of words that my parents identified as "dirty words." My sisters and I were taught not to use any of these words. Some of them were words most children weren't allowed to use. At that time in history those words were rarely heard in public, in movies, or on the radio.
There were other words we were not allowed to use that were not necessarily bad words, but we were not old enough to know how and when to use them appropriately. In those days, there was a sense of decorum in public and there were many words that weren't considered bad, but using them, especially in mixed company, demonstrated lack of respect for others. For example, one would never have heard someone use the word "sex" in public nor would one mention the scientific names for body parts.
Today this standard is almost comical. For example, a play that is currently gaining worldwide attention is called, "The Vagina Monologue" and a follow-up play called "The Penis Monologue" is currently under way. Oddly, the words "vagina" and "penis" used to make people so uncomfortable that even in the privacy of our homes we created all sorts of ways to talk about these body parts without saying the words. While some might see this change as liberating, I generally find it a bit disquieting that we seem to have lost any sense of propriety.
In recent years, there has been an interesting cultural transition in regard to dirty words. Language that at one time one could only hear at a shipyard, is now used with increasing fluency. Yet other words that didn't used to be "dirty" are now a part of a new list of bad words. Space doesn't allow for a long list, but here are two examples:
"Proper." To suggest that some behaviors are "proper" and others are improper is to set oneself up for criticism. In fact, some readers may have taken offense to my use of the word "propriety" above. Virtuous behavior is considered old-fashioned and to suggest that we should expect wholesomeness in certain environments is nearly always considered puritanical. For example, a few months ago, William Bennett, the author of "Book Of Virtue" and "The Broken Hearth," was ridiculed because it was revealed that he lost a million dollars gambling. No critic has been able to discount the truth of what he was saying in his books. Instead, discrediting the author was the only way to ignore his premise - that virtue is dead.
"Moral." Any suggestion that there is a right or wrong is heresy. Postmodernism teaches that there is no absolute truth. Yet this philosophy seems to deny the obvious. Of course there is absolute truth. Postmodernists who argue there is no absolute truth are contradicting themselves because the statement itself is evidence of the belief in an absolute truth. Postmodernist thinking was intended to broaden the minds of people who believed that their way of thinking was the only possible way. However, this well-intentioned philosophy morphed into an indefensible position.
Most religious believers are convinced of the ultimate truth of their respective faiths. They must think this way; otherwise, there would be nothing in which to believe. Oddly, it is this same commitment that leads postmodernists to snub their noses at religious teachings. Postmodernists believe they are right and this belief that there is no absolute truth is, itself, a moral value. In essence, we all maintain some kind of moral base that we believe to be true. We only differ in the facts on which those moral beliefs rest. Only one who holds absolutely no beliefs whatsoever, if that is even possible, could truly claim that there is no absolute truth, yet such a claim would then be a belief.
One of the main sources from which we learn how to think and behave is our culture. Using what were formerly "dirty words" receives little condemnation these days, but daring to utter one of these modern dirty words will bring on the wrath of the postmodern thinkers. Once again demonstrating the clear contradiction in postmodernist thinking, to question one's use of the former dirty words is considered puritanical, but these same people find it reasonable to condemn one's use of current dirty words. Simply put, in our present condition our culture seems bent on teaching that vulgarity is normal and that morality is old-fashioned and something that is practiced only by the most backward thinkers. This is a troubling shift in values and it is frightening to think about what our culture will be like for our children if this trend continues.
(Dr.
Moffatt is a child therapist in private practice, author of "The
Parenting Journey" and professor of psychology at Atlanta
Christian College.)